how to live a life of quiet desperation

After the Easter sermon series at NewPointe, we'll begin a series called Adventures In Missing the Point. The premise is that so many of us live lives of quiet desperation...settling for less than what life could be, substituting easy highs and quick-fixes for authenticity and real love. And so I've been thinking about this concept of quiet desperation. Thoreau is quoted as saying, "Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them." As my buddy Dave D'Angelo would say, "Don't be that guy."

Or as my friend Rhonda Lowe would say, "Let the song out" (or, Just Sing). :)

So, if you're interested in continuing to live a life of quiet desperation (or you're interested in beginning one, here's my list of ways to accomplish that:

1. Save your love for the weekends. In other words, exclude love from your relationships at work. Wait till you get up on Saturdays with your family before you share love.

2. Never learn anything more than the headlines (Who's Anna Nicole's baby's father, who's going to win American Idol, etc.) and then limit your conversations to that kind of stuff.

3. Don't read books.

4. Spend at least three hours a day in front of the TV.

5. Don't ever act silly with your kids.

6. Get locked into a job that you despise and then tell yourself you could never leave because it would be "too risky."

7. Speaking of "risky," don't ever take risks--it's too risky.

8. Make sure you're really, really concerned about what people think of you.

9. Find your comfort zone and stay there.

10. Turn on the TV while you're having dinner with your family.

11. Be bitter. Hold onto a grudge.

12. Pay more attention to what Oprah and Dr. Phil say than what the Bible says.

13. Blame your spouse for the reasons your marriage is less-than-perfect.

14. Do all your correspondance through e-mail. Don't write notes and stick them in the mail.

15. Make sure your lawn is the absolute nicest in the neighborhood...and keep everybody off of it!

16. Complain often.

17. Assume you're entitled to stuff.

18. Make sure you're always asking, "What's in it for me?"

20. Look for quick-fixes and easy-way-outs.

21. Choose the remote and the sofa over helping your wife with the dishes.

22. Don't volunteer.

23. Be too busy to spend time alone with your Heavenly Father.

24. Make $$$ more important than relationships.

25. Stop reading and learing new things. Adopt this attitude" I'm out of school, I don't need to learn stuff anymore."

26. Be passive. Let stuff happen to you instead of going out and making things happen.

27. Have secrets.

28. Listen to that voice in your head that says, "I'm too old to do that," or, "I don't have the willpower to do that."

29. Don't journal. It takes too much time.

30. Always play the devil's advocate. Always bring up the negative side of things.

31. Don't sing. Keep that song inside for goodness' sake!

I could go on...but I figure that's enough to get us started. Leave me feedback with stuff you think should be added to the list. I'm interested to hear your thoughts.